What I can help you with
Relationships / Anxiety / Depression / Stress / Compulsions / Improve Wellbeing / Abuse /
Post Traumatic Stress / Negative thoughts / Isolation / Trauma / Anger management / Dissociation / Life crisis / Parenting anxieties / Low self-esteem / Life management /
Post-Natal Depression / Indecisiveness /...
You don't have to have a specific reason to start therapy. You may feel that you need help with something, but can't quite put your finger on it. There may be more than one aspect of your life that needs your attention. Or you may feel like an observer in your own life, rather than living in it. On the other hand, there might be something specific that you want to resolve.
I am here to help you explore and find out what is getting in your way; where the blocks to your growth are; what is stopping you from enjoying your life.
Prioritise
Support
Stratergise
Encourage self-compassion
Help you achieve growth
Quieten the inner critic
Challenge
Focus
Listen without judgement
Kindness
Grounding
Access neglected parts of yourself
Compassion
Warm
Non-judgemental
Empathic
Caring
Compassionate
Relationships
We are social beings, and as such our relationships are very important to us. In fact, psychoanalyst John Bowlby - father of the Attachment Theory - suggested that our wellbeing is dependent on the quality of our relationships.
Our first relationships are significant in determining how we build future friendships and romantic alliances.
Our relationship with our mother (or primary caregiver)for example, is possibly the most important one in our life -laying the foundations for how we relate to others,(and our unconscious expectations and wishes of them) as well as our capacity for trust, and how we give and receive love.
The relationship we have with our father can equally create expectations, unconscious wishes and patterns of relating.
We carry all these relationship templates with us all the time - probably beneath our awareness.
We can look at your patterns of relating, shedding light on where difficulties, and perhaps, disappointments in your relationships lie.
Anxiety
Shallow breathing, tension in the jaw, sweaty palms, heart racing, feeling of fear, chest pains, tight chest, tension headache, frequent urination, dry mouth, hands trembling, accelerated speech.
Anxiety can be caused by many factors and can be short-lived or chronic. At the very basis of it is a conflict between what we want and what we are getting or having to do. We may not be aware what the conflict is, it may be deep rooted and we may have lost contact with part of us that is suffering and objecting.
We can explore your needs and I will help you find the part of you that hasn't been seen, acknowledge your pain and try and soothe your anxiety.
Depression
Ruminating thoughts, low mood, feelings of pointlessness, overwhelming feeling of sadness that won't go, suicidal ideation, bleakness, lacking in motivation, lethargy, no light at the end of the tunnel, difficulty sleeping, too much sleep, spending too much time in bed, feeling lonely, isolated, persistent negative thoughts.
One in four of us will suffer from depression at some point in our lives. There are many things that may trigger depression; a sudden change in our life, a traumatic event, loss of a loved one, adaptation to new circumstances. Or it could be chronic, originating from an early age. Nutrition can also affect our mood, as can the change of seasons.
Depression can push us into isolation, which makes matters worse. Talking about it can make a significant difference, and in extreme cases can protect from suicide.
In therapy, we can talk about how you are feeling and try and make sense of it, explore its roots and work our how to work through it. At the very least you will not feel isolated with this terrible affliction and you will feel there is support at hand.
Compulsions
Checking, counting, shopping, washing, gambling, sex, hoarding, eating, pulling hair, nail-biting, skin-picking, talking...
Compulsive behaviours can get in the way of life. It is in the nature of compulsions that we cannot get a break from them. In their extreme form, they become obsessive and can stop us from getting out the house, keeping a job, or even having a healthy relationship.
You may have persistant and unwanted thoughts that seem to invade your mind, for which you feel you have no control over (obsessions). Engaging in a strict routine of repeated actions can relieve the anxiety that these thoughts create and bring a sense of safety and security with them.
Talking about your compulsions and thoughts may sound like a daunting prospect, but as we build trust and you feel safe enough, you may find great relief in sharing and expressing your fears to a compassionate ear. At your pace and within what is comfortable to you, we can talk about your behaviour and explore the origin of your unwanted thoughts. At the same time, we will work on changing your behaviour and your thinking to overcome your compulsions.